Thursday, June 18, 2015

A shitty existence

Has anyone ever noticed that the people with the most mental health issues are usually the ones who are extremely smart? Think Einstein, John Nash and the countless others out there. I consider myself smart, but most likely not at the level of the geniuses I've mentioned.

What would make a person, that to an outsider, has it all; intelligence and a good lifestyle. Why are they more likely to flip out than the rest of the populace?

Me thinks that at some level, their subconscious is tuned in to the world more keenly, and concludes that it is screwed up big time. Look around everywhere. It's mostly the selfish assholes that become wealthy and they become wealthy because that inbuilt moral compass that would direct their attention to the suffering of others is turned off.

That part of being human that tells you that it's not fair to live in excess while others die of hunger, seems to be turned off. Where your dogs are better fed than more that 60% of the world's population. Where is the fairness, and why do people so blatantly exploit each other?

Look at the earth, it's the only planet that for hundreds of light years around  that can sustain life. What are we doing? Using up it's resources like there will be no future generations that will need these  resources in order to survive. We know we're destroying it but can't give even the slightest hint

The same thing that allowed mankind to become the dominant being on earth is the same one that'll lead to his destruction. God really has a funny sense of humour. Give them brains, build in a self destruct mechanism.

Maybe that's why we've never encountered any other form of intelligent life. Maybe all life has a self destruct sequence built in their genes that upon reaching a certain stage of evolution, activates and they destroy themselves. It's probably a vicious cycle that has manifested itself for eons meaning that no form of life will ever go beyond interstellar travel within their local solar system.

I know it eats at me constantly. Why are we like this. Why do I sometimes show that type of aggressive competitiveness? Why am I also conditioned to want a life that will ultimately lead to exploiting others? As an environmentalist I understand that, used well, the resources are more than enough for all of us and reverse whatever damage has been done so far. But where does the incessant need to feel better than others come from? That need that justifies us actively pulling the rugs from under each other in the hopes that the pedestals we put ourselves on will be a couple inches higher than the ones the others have placed themselves on.

I don't understand. Life is constantly throwing shit at us. We're knee deep in shit and more shit is coming our way but the person beside you will take a handful of shit and try to convince you how less smelly their shit is than yours. And you know, you are in the same friggin' river of shit. You try explain that there is no difference, but get told off, to go mind your own shit. Rather than clean up collectively and get rid of the shit once and for all, we're busy trying to convince others how much better our shit is. It's tragic story.

We compete at unnecessary and redundant levels. My God is better than your God, yet neither of us has ever encountered our Gods. I am happier than you; yet the things that (supposedly) make one happy are very relative and thus can't be comparatively quantified. You like gaming, I like traveling and swimming. You live for social interactions, I live for commuting with nature. We're so different, but we don't achieve high levels of happiness the same way.

Point is, the world is damaged. We're damaged. We damage each other in the process of trying to prove to the others that they're more damaged than us. Ultimately, we're all going to finish each other of.

What is the pride in being the last person standing in a race where everyone was intended to win?